You know it, I know it, just make it happen.
That's right folks. I'm declaring my allegiance and will sign with The Real Starky Age Group Team for the 2015 triathlon season and beyond. Of course, that is if I'm drafted. Now to the pomp and awesomeness that will gain me this infamy.
Eligibility:
Currently no one loves me. That is, I don't fly anyone's colors or kit. I'm a free agent!
Awesomeness:
C'mon, do you have to ask? OK, well the rap sheet for 2014 looks decent. 7 amateur triathlons with 7 podium spots. 5 of those were overall podiums. [Cue the pat the on back] I don't race Iron distance. I race only Sprints and Super Sprints and it turns out I'm good at them. Quite frankly, I don't have the attention span for any run longer than a 5K.
What does this mean for Team TRS? More pictures of a giant cock and "soon to be named" sponsor. This is in addition to my already TRS fueled presence at races! And the wife may not always have clothes on at races. So there's that.
I also may or may not run a separate parody account concerning a certain global triathlon company's problems.
Community Service:
This was court ordered right? I mean, why else are we doing this? Well, as an added benefit, I always have enough bail money for me and 1 other in my special needs bag. So I can help out other troubled TRS team mates. I can drink with the best (and worst) ((and worstest)) of them. I look forward to TRS Team meetings. I'd imagine them looking like the #beermile, but with Whiskey.
Code of Conduct:
I have a day job (unfortunatly) so I don't need to take anything from the industry (read not #sponsored). If you really wanted to see my workouts, then stalk me on Strava or something, but I won't bore you with my gnarly swim or killer brick set. Plus, I've lasted this long as a @therealstarky follower, so I must be doing it right already.
Draft away mother f@#&ers. Cause it's this or I'm going pro at badminton. #RocktheShuttleCock
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